No eulogy could even begin to list all the great things Barb contributed to her family, friends, relatives, & all those she knew. The memories I will share with you will be an attempt to allow you to get to know her as I did after 61 years of marriage.

Barb was a kind & caring person. She was a bit shy and self-conscious. She strived in every way for acceptance and approval of all those with whom she interacted, whether family, friends, or strangers. Spending years early in her life competing in dance, music, and baton twirling, where approval meant winning, most likely led to this “approval-seeking” behavior.

She excelled at baton twirling and was a tri-state champion, winning a baton twirling major competition. Later, when she retired from twirling competition, she held training sessions to train students in the skills of baton twirling.

Barb loved to dance. She was professionally trained and excelled in ballet and tap dancing with her sister, Margie; they danced at many shows & events. They even hired an agent to book their appearances. Barb eventually started her own dance studio where she taught many students how to dance. Singing was another talent she had. She sang at several functions.

Flower arranging was a natural talent for Barb. Having no formal training, she could make amazing bouquets. I would raise certain flowers in our garden so I could supply her with flowers to arrange for us to enjoy. She could make a handful of daisies look like a bouquet of roses!

Barb loved children and earned her college degree in education from Ohio University. She loved teaching fourth graders and those with learning disabilities. “Special reading” developed for those students with learning problems became her specialty. For 29 years, she positively impacted the lives of her students and their families. Her students loved her! She gave them love and knowledge, not just knowledge; she excelled in her classroom. It was her route to total acceptance and approval. Her students showed her their unconditional love for her. Teaching gave her a sense of purpose without competitive pressures. She loved it!

Collecting jewelry, especially Indian jewelry and silver, was something she really enjoyed. We had lots of fun together shopping for that piece of jewelry that “spoke to us.” I bought her jewelry on every occasion! I truly believe she had more jewelry than some jewelry stores!

She enjoyed, as I did, collecting all types of antiques from glassware to furniture. We spent many weekends together with our friends searching for these antique treasures. Barb was addicted to shoes! I know at one time, she had over 100 pairs!

As I said previously, Barb loved to dance. She taught a backwoods farm boy like me some pretty “smooth moves” on the dance floor. Slow dance or fast dance, we could do it all thanks to her. Dancing became one of our favorite things to do. Less than one month ago, we danced our last dance together at our grandson’s wedding. What a blessing God gave us!

Barb was an extremely spiritual person and often could feel energy and see images and predict happenings. I learned of the spiritual gift very early in our relationship. We had a date to go to a nice restaurant in Chillicothe, Ohio. I decided to take a route through an alley to avoid traffic and streetlights. Suddenly, Barb shouted, “Stop the car!” I stopped and looked over at her and said, “What is wrong?” She replied, “I feel we are in Danger.” “Please back out of this alley.” Before I had a chance to move the car, another car raced through the alley that crossed the alley we were travelling. Had we continued, there would have been a terrible accident which could have seriously injured or killed us! From that time forward, I followed her commands & feelings.

Barb, even though she was shy & self-conscious and approval seeking, had a very strong inner strength. She had a way to calm me down when I was troubled. She would help me see the problem I was having with a new perspective. That gave me confidence and a more positive outlook. She became my “rock” when I needed loving support, understanding, and a new direction. I called on her strength many times in the 61 years we were together. Now, as I must live on earth without her, I know she will still guide and support me from heaven.

Everyone liked Barb! She was kind & compassionate and always respected all with whom she knew & met. She enjoyed hearing and telling jokes and funny happenings in life. Many times, when we met with friends, a “joke-telling session” emerged, and laughter cheered our souls and gave all of us a break from life’s daily challenges.

Barb’s zodiac sign was Libra(scales). Everything had to be balanced and even. If one candle’s placement on our mantle did not match the other candle’s position, it had to be corrected! If a picture hanging on the wall somehow got tilted just a little, it had to be fixed. You can imagine how long it took to decorate our Christmas tree! I quickly learned to get her okay before I did anything that might possibly create a balance problem.

Making even minor choices and decisions were challenging for Barb because of her compelling desire to please and be accepted by everyone. If we were shopping and she found two pairs of slacks she liked, one blue & one black, it would take her fifteen minutes to decide which pair to buy! I would have made that decision in five seconds! After a while, I realized that her indecisiveness was a buffer counteracting my impulsive & quick decision making. Opposites DO attract and create strong bonds and serve to improve all decision making in life. Her message to me was “slow down and think things through before you make your decisions.” I finally got it!

Cooking was another talent she had mastered. Her banana cream pie was to die for. I loved her spaghetti and pot roast! She taught our son, Bryan, how to cook at a very early age. Today, years later, he is a gourmet cook.

Later in our 61 years together, as dementia developed, I began cooking for us. I enjoyed cooking, but my methods called for exact measurements like 4oz of milk, ½ a cup of flour, one tablespoon of salt, and so forth. I had trouble with a “pinch of salt”, a generous portion of pepper, a dash of baking soda, etc., etc. Learning to cook from Barb, who measured very little, was indeed challenging but fun. My dishes were never as good as hers unless I grilled the entire meal! Anytime I got discouraged about how to cook something, she would assure me I was doing fine. Maybe I had a little “acceptance & approval-seeking” desire, too, as she did!

Barb battled health & energy problems for most of her adult life. She had extensive dental work with lots of fillings. These fillings leached lead into her body, and she got so weak, before she was diagnosed, that she could not walk to our mailbox 100 feet away. Almost all her teeth had to be extracted. She had to attend over thirty 3-hour chelation sessions to remove the lead from her body. Her energy level was never the same after that. She became very holistic and took several herbs & supplements to try to get healthy again.

Toward the end of her teaching career, she was diagnosed with interstitial cystitis, an inflammation of the lining of the bladder. It was a very painful disease if uncontrolled. She could not eat citrus fruits; if she did, she would double over with pain. It was a horrible experience for her. Thanks to the grace of God, her holistic behavior and a very holistic doctor, she conquered her affliction and was able to enjoy life again.

Barb was super sensitive! She could not tolerate even the slightest pain. Her reaction to medicine was several times more severe than the normal reaction most people have. That sensitivity was also present in her emotional makeup. She was very tender-hearted and would often have painful reactions to people’s harsh words to her or criticisms of her; again, she wanted approval & acceptance and really, really cared about what others thought of her.

In the 61 years we spent together, we had many good times and some bad times. We loved one another, hurt one another, consoled one another, and helped one another. Little did I realize just how precious these 61 years with all our ups & downs were!

For all those years, I had an angel in my house and by my side and took it all for granted. The lesson Barb would teach you about her passing on to eternal life would be: Love & appreciate each other every day, and respect & accept each other for who they are. Draw strength from your differences and be ever aware that the team you have created, with all its love, will someday be very different. One team member will pass into the next life, and the other will remain on earth to pull through life without a physical body & soul to have & hold, share & talk, and love & cherish.

I am beginning this journey without Barb physically here with me! I will be able to complete this transformation of my remaining life on earth knowing by God’s grace she will love, support and guide me with her spirit from heaven. Our team is still there! It is just in a different format!

Barb positively influenced the lives of all she touched with her gifts of love & respect and kindness & caring! She was the “Real Deal”

Now you know her as I did. Enjoy her gifts & teachings as you continue in life. She’s watching from heaven! In her passing to eternal life, she gave me one last gift, she made me closer to God!

Thanks, Barb!

I love you!